I’m not people who concern enough with the term “new year”. The main reason why I love new year is because it’s time to get fun with friends, to spend holiday, and to celebrate something. Not as ambitious as other people who might say, “in this new year, i will bla bla bla.. my resolution for this year is bla bla bla.. ” No. And I completely forgot, did I make any resolutions last year? I guess zero.

So now I’m going to reflect about how my 2011 was going.

A little moved backward, I had one of the worst day in my life in December 2010. I broke with my boyfriend. It was surprised and shocked me.  Our relationship was too deep, like all the huge families were already connected. Kind like that. During December, life was like a never ending nightmare. Full of crying, grieving, whinning. Then I entered 2011, in fun trip. A good start to refresh my life.

During January, life was slightly different, I started to teach my own class in school that I’ve been working. I used to be very stressed during my first 2 weeks. I need to adapt with 20 kids in my class. It wasn’t as easy as I thought before.This month was all about my working.

And, I started to think about myself. Think about things that I couldn’t do before. I’ve joined UDW, dance academy, that i enjooy so much. One of the best decision I made. I tried to enrich myself by learning other language. I joined CCF, and at least, I can make some introduction in French now.

My udw and ccf things worked well. My days was full from monday to sunday. Started from January 2011, and still until now, This has been my daily routine:

Monday-friday : working from 8 am to 3 pm. 1-2 days a week, hang out with friends/ shop by myself.

Saturday: ccf 8-12, having saturday night with friends.

Sunday: UDW 10-12.

I started to reconnect with my friends. You know, me and that ex used to spend the whole life together, like monday to sunday, morning to night. I still played with friends in some occasions. But, just more like, occasionally. Gladly, my friends were still there. They understood, welcomed, and was happy when I back.

In the middle of February, I started my relationship again with that ex. Actually, in December, we made agreement to talk our stuffs again after a month. So there we were. We’re back in relationship, but things didn’t work well. So on July, I decided to give up. I love to give up when I’ve already tried my best. Trying is good when you know when to stop. When you keep trying without consider everything between and around, it is stupid. I relieved at that time. I was sad, but not as much as in December, because I know, I’ve already tried. I needed to open my eyes.

I had my birthday on July. I used to think that my birthday would be worse without that ex, that used to give sweet surprise and stuffs every year. But, my sister did something for me. She made surprise party and invited some friends. I’ve got another surprise party at work. So, it wasn’t that bad.

Move to 2nd semester in 2011. Forgetsick about that ex, I moved to another ex (look stupid, wasn’t I?). I felt like that was my time. I never had time to try some works with this ex, so I took my chance. I wanted to fix something stuck in my heart. Our ‘stuffs’ was on and off, and didn’t work well. So, we’re done for good in the beginning of December. Again, i relieved.

In this second semester, I also took ielts preparation course, and test. Finally I tried to apply a scholarship. I was so happy that I could freely think further about my own future. Eventhough seems like I didn’t get the scholarship, again, I relieved. I’ve tried my best. Fyi, for only one month preparation, I got 6,5 for my ielts. proud of me

On October i started to join Penyala MTB. The idea of this not-so-called-organization is great, we collect books for those who need in Maluku Tenggara Barat.  I am a public relation here, and my job is fun. Writing on the blog, post in facebook and twitter, easy. And sometimes, doing some additional project based on request, voluntary. But, I think that I did not do my best here yet, unfortunately. I haven’t been played with full of my heart in those projects. Maybe just not yet. I still want to give more on next.

And, on November, finally I decided to resign from my school on next June. I love this school, i love my kids, i pretty like my job, but, I want to gain more. I’m thinking about taking master degree, or, working in company. I want to try new experience. I’m still young. I want to do all i want. No one could stop me. I’m doing positive things, right?

Middle of December, ehem, I started to have crush with somebody who I’d love to talk lately. Again, I tried. A little bit. I haven’t feel relieved yet, because I hadn’t try my best. You knowww it’s hard to start anything when you are a girl. I couldn’t talk about this man more, I’ve wrote about him before, but I guess i’ve deleted

What else you want to know? I think those are almost all my things during 2011. I would thank those who spend time with me during 2011. To my best friends, who gave sprinkle stars in my 2011. And I would say sorry of making some mistakes during that year.

I say 2011 is a year of trying and year of relieving. I satisfied enough with myself during that year. I feel i grow up in a good way, become more mature, and gain more and better experience. I’m moving on in positive ways. Alhamdulillah

2012? Year for continue trying, year for achieving more. Bismillah

Good luck for me, and for all of you! Cheers! Happy 2012

m : sekalian paling. namanya juga laki.

n: hahah. naksir kayanya. ngomongin kerjaannya grogi.

m: ladenin seperlunya aja.

They stare at me. Why you can’t be one of them?

I want you. I crave you. I am crazieh.

but I’m not freak. and it’s hard to be one.

btw, one of my friend that used to stare at me finally have a girlfriend! so happy! congrats brooo!

H: r u busy?.
M: why?
H: do u mind if I call you tonight?
M: what for?
H: I’ll explain on the phone. Nothing serious..
M: ok

That friend is a man who has a good integrity at school. He is very very nice. I was wondering why suddenly he wanted to talk to me. It never happened before.

And he’s just called me to say…
H: hi nin, sorry for bothering you.. So.. I hv a relative. He saw you on facebook, then he asked me to introduce himself to you.
M: what? Hahaha
H: “aku cm mau menyampaikan amanah nin. Dia mintanya aku telfon,katanya jgn lewat bbm ngomongnya, aku pake dibeliin pulsa segala, jadinya ga enak, jadi ya aku sampein..”
M: aha… (I know sih, this person is really2 nice person, literally)
H: he’s not that serious, he’s just want to add friends.
M: hahaha
H: maybe he can just add your pin, and if he annoyes you, you can tell me, but I think he won’t
M: hahaha. Ok.

If you know me well, you know what’s in my mind right now. And you know, whether he’ll be succeed or not. I say : a wrong start.

And. If you are psychology fellas. The person who called me was. Ehm, start with letter D, end with letter T.

Hahaha. So u know how I feel right?

So, I just knew that yesterday, on 9.10.11, one of man that i’ve dated with, was getting married!! (not the one i mentioned on my previous blog, fortunately )

Actualy I’ve heard news that he would be married soon, but I forgot the exact date.

Well, happy wedding dimsum!! So happy for you! Wish you everlasting happiness goodluck for your new life

Calm, I’m really cool about that. That was a summer love only :p

I’m in situation that, i really want to write something here but I can not. Even i know this is my blog and I can write anything I want. But.. i just can’t.

I think better if I stop my writing.

Finger crossed for my sister’s wedding. Hope everything will be ok. And the most important, she is happy.

Anything, for her happiness. I love you kak, good luck for your day

ps: currently fall in love with another adele’s song

Bonjour, comment ca va? after  a long busy months at school work, finally i had a month breath-taking time. Got 2 days holiday since kids was on holiday term.Then worked on holiday program at school. That’s much better, at least, no paper works. And i’m getting more in love with my working environment. and also to my family and my friends, i love them a lot. They’re always there, and makes me forget about heart thingy. So, so far, those things are good and je suis assez heureux

La vie n’est jamais plate. Life is never ever flat. Got another problem lately related to . . . . you know. I don’t know what i am doing.  This is one of a weird time in my life. Just walk on it. *finger crossed*

Btw, have I post about my photos when performed on Ultimate dance challange? It’s a kind of internal competition presented by united dance works. Small competition, but makes me feel that i love dance that much. J’aime la danse. Like my twitter bio: i keep dancing in order to life.

Here a few photos. Had no one to take the picture with my camera, my sister was taking the video but i am lazy to upload here. I’m not sattisfied with my performed either. sorry!

Got Best Appearence (Best costume) Thank’s my coach!

And here’s a link of the video posted by my friend on facebook. I hope it works : dance video
Done! Last words, J’ai adore mon amie, Elle est Hanifa asra silmi. She’s the one i can trust to tell almost all my feeling. She’s fair but never blames me. She gives me a different perspection to see this life. God, je l’aime. Merci beacoup maymay .

and, I got acne precisely under my lips. It’s getting bigger each day and the worst is it makes one side of  my lips bulged. How ugly i am this week. (((((((((((((((

And i’m getting so tired to have full days of activities. Work on monday-friday. French course on saturday, and dance class on Sunday. Not forget to mention, manage bonny fuschia and hang out almost every saturday night.

I am getting weak lately, My body can’t afford it. But i love all my activities. If only i can work only on tuesday – friday (((

I am sorry for this grumble post.

I’ve been so busy lately. After, 2,5 years, I never have a lot of activities like nowadays. I have 2 new courses, english n dance, and I’m going to take another one, which means monday to sunday my days will be full. Then I also plan to join an organization.

Maybe this is the good part of being single, I don’t need to think about my partner or listen about his opinion about what I wanna do. I do what I can do, I want to do. I don’t want to throw any chances I face. As far as I like it, I take it.

A little problem now, my body sometimes can’t afford it. You know, I easily get sick, and I’ve a chronic cough in the late 6 months. I take a medicine once a day and still under doctor’s controlled. I hope I can handle my sickness because I’m happy with all my thingy now

But, u know, however, sometimes I miss love.

This afternoon, I was driving home from hs, alone. In traffic, because of low concentration (I played with my bb, bad me bad bad bad), I hitted a taxi. It just a little bit, I even didn’t notice it until the taxi stopped and the driver went out from the taxi and asked me too. I was so frightened. Really. It was my first time and I didn’t know what to do. I just said sorry to the driver and asked what should I do. Then the driver asked my phone number and told I should go to the taxi pool. I said ok. And then that’s all, he back to the taxi because there were passangers waiting him.

I came back to my car, and continue driving. Still shocked, and scared also. I called ichsan then cried to him and told all the story. And as usual, he said it’s okay, he tried to make me calm down, and he would help me to solve the problem. After I gave the driver’s number, Ich called the him but no answer. Then he texted him said that he is my brother and would fix the problem, blabla.

I feel … U name it.

God, thanks for sent him to me. “Brother”.

Thank you my ich

Btw: still bad feeling now, I hope this problem will be solved well, as soon as possible.